Going into motherhood I thought the actual birth of my son would be the most painful experience. No one discussed breastfeeding with me. One person said “It’s going to suck for a little bit”, but other than that, I was led to believe it would be a wonderful bonding experience. Well, much like everything else in pregnancy and motherhood, I found breastfeeding to be highly romanticized. I wasn’t warned that it was something I would have to fight for. So, if you’re a mom to a newborn and find yourself struggling, you are not alone.
Let’s discuss a lesser-focused topics of breastfeeding.
Breastfeeding is hard. There is a learning curve for both you as a mom and your baby. Most of the time, the baby’s latch is not perfect. Just as you will have to learn which position best helps your baby effectively feed, your baby will have to learn a proper latch. Pain can be associated with this learning curve. I personally experience a lot of pain. Had someone discussed this with me, I might have been able to understand and compartmentalize the pain a little better than I did.
The American Board of Pediatrics recommends that you breastfeed your baby for at least 6 months and up to 12 months with properly incorporated solids. Now, is it the absolute must for all mothers? No, it isn’t. Momma, if your mental health is on the decline and breastfeeding/pumping makes it worse, you can stop. Rest assured that it’s okay to wean your baby as early as you need.
As a mom, your mental/physical health is of top priority. You cannot be the best momma for your baby if you aren’t the best version of yourself. This was a point that I probably struggled with the most in my decision to wean from breastfeeding. I will admit, mom guilt got me HARD. Consistently reading how my baby needs to breastfeed for at least six months made me feel like the worse mother in the world. I had already started exclusively pumping and stopping completely felt like I was being selfish. All the while, my mental health was on the decline. It finally took a good long talk with my mother-in-law to realize that I needed to be healthy, before he could be healthy. At the end of the day, my little man deserved the best version of myself I can be.
So, if you aren’t feeling that “bonding experience” everyone talks about or just struggling with the overall pain, you aren’t alone. It’s okay to stop exclusively breastfeeding/pumping. It’s okay to feed your baby formula. Fed is truly the best.